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(c) 2011 Food Network Humor - All Rights Reserved
We are not affiliated with the Food Network, or any of their hosts, in any way. This is a satire, humor, and parody website.
(c) 2011 Food Network Humor - All Rights Reserved
49 Responses
When did Phyllis Diller get her own cooking show??
I have an Chewbaca doll circa 1975(ish) that has ‘hair’ texture just like that. And Chewy was dragged around by a little kid for years so he’s got an excuse…
right and that’s at her very best.
She actually looks decent in this picture. Her hair is always wacky and it does remind me of Phyllis Diller but her face isn’t as bloated looking.
Anyone ever see this pic?
http://www.iceculinary.com/news/people/people_10.shtml
Maybe it’s been bleached so much all she can do is let it free-range like that. It looks like the hair on those troll dolls.
Anyone remember the troll dolls – they were sometimes called “dams” – from the ’60s? I had one with hair that looked just like that! Gotta tell ya, though, the dam thing was really cute ;)
Poor Anne.
CherryRose, I remember troll dolls. They were all the rage! Their popularity was as hot as the beanie babies were. Or pet rocks. Or hula hoops. Or David Hasselhoff…
She can pull it off.
Guy can’t.
And I bet she does not wear sandals in the kitchen of restaurants.
She wins.
Both Anne Burrell and Susie Folgelson do not own one single hairbrush.
they (guy and anne) should breed. their offspring would be little troll dolls.
Oh I just like Anne, her hair fits perfectly her frenzy personality with the growling thing.
I think she’s what she is: A CHEF.
Not like this Rachel Ray who says she’s not a chef, just a cook (but she’s getting really wealthy as a “faux-chef” on TV)
And finally I believe Burrell’s techniques are quite handy.
She looks like Kristy Swanson… in a wind tunnel.
Surely she fries her own hair. A professional wouldn’t do THAT, would they?
Sandra, that photo might have just answered a question that I’ve had about her all along.
And Sarah, you are on the money tossing Susie’s hair into the conversation.
@ Sandra: I don’t think that’s a picture of Ann. It looks like they mistakenly posted a picture of her dad!
Speaking of breeding, where is the FNHumor feature that combined various FN personalities Jill ran ealier this year ? That was hysterical. I still have nightmare when she “bred” Goldman and Mary KAte in the photo.
Will we ever see that again?
YOu could breed d’Arabian with so many people.
Think she has carpet to match the drapes?
@Sandra
omg…when I opened up that link, I thought I was looking at Pat Boone!!
I wouldn’t know if Anne’s techniques are handy are not….I can’t get bast the gutteral noises that she makes when cooking. She’s actually one of my FN worst (her, Guy, and that health food chick)
A little off topic but…
Ya know, it makes you wonder. Why does FN give Brian Boitano and Jeff Corwin their own tv shows (supposedly, this Corwin show is supposed to be a rip off of Bourdain’s No Reservations)? I would much rather see some more Nigella Lawson than Corwin or Boitano. I am a huge Nigella fan…I mean she’s a british bombshell in my opinion and when she cooks, you can tell she really loves the food. She has a huge vocabulary to describe what she’s making and all of her stuff looks delicious. It sucks having to wake up extra early, 7:30 EST, on a Saturday morning to see her!
Nigella 24/7 would be fine with me.
@ Patrick: Couldn’t agree more about Nigella’s intelligent commentary. I’m so tired of hearing Giadada say crap like “the sugar makes it sweet” or “it’s so buttery because of all the butter in it”. And if I hear one more grown-ass woman say “yummy” or “yummo” I’m going to stab myself in the neck!
@Jaynie: “It looks like the hair on those troll dolls.”
We must have been posting about the troll dolls simultaneouly this morning! I had one that I carried around with me for good luck when I was in high school in the mid-60s :) Anne B’s hair immediately reminded me of my miniature “dam”.
I loathe Nigella! Not only am I repulsed by her coy winking and posturing for the camera, her recipes don’t work for me. What sounds like it would be tasty ends up tasting like dog food. However, she does have passio for cooking and that’s okay by me. Different strokes, blah blah.
But I like and admire Anne. She’s eccentric; so what? She’s knowledgeable and fun to watch, if only by waiting breathlessly to see if she’ll cut a fart by bending over in one of those tight skirt/top combos she prefers. And she explains how and why she does what she does as she’s cooking, so you actually can learn something from this show. Finally, she seems to have escaped most of the stupid crossover crap that TFN seems to require of their employees (note, I am NOT calling them chefs, I don’t care what their biographies call them). Viva Anne!
I wanna know what team Anne Burrell plays for. Anyone know ? Surely gotta be a fellow or past co-worker to verify.
PS My troll originally had white hair, which I promptly colored with multiple colors of chalk pastels. So he was the first hippie troll. Or maybe the first pimp troll. Whatever.
@Tatiana: My mind’s eye is picturing a troll wearing one of those colorful clown wigs ;)
If Ann had normal hair, what would you complain about? Everyone has *something* and somehow that hair is really important to her identity since I am 100% sure someone somewhere has offered to restyle it….
(Totally agree with Tatiana above.)
Okay, so her hair is terrible, but Ann actually teaches me something and her recipes are fair. It’s about Outback Steakhouse quality kind of food. Not buffet style, not gross, not semi-homemade, not cheap, but not foie gras Ina Garten style. Ann’s steaks look pretty tasty. No obnoxious stories about her life that we don’t care for. She’s solid. Leave her be!
As for Nigella – her sultry kittenness is so contrived and saccharine. It’s overkill. WHO IS THAT MESSY in the KITCHEN? Drizzling honey over yourself? How can you measure food properly? Don’t get fooled by the accent. You hate the Neelys and Giada but like Nigella?! She has mixed reviews in Britain because she carries on like she’s an everyday “busy” mom but takes cabs to buy posh and organic foods in the afternoon. I don’t think her recipes that inventive and I find those close-ups of her eating nauseating. I can’t watch her because she is too sexual. That’s why she was on the Style network for years! It’s about HER, and the producers shoving in the viewers faces just how sexy she is. I hate the endings where you see her, for example, waddle over to the fridge and pour whipping cream over her croissant bread pudding (which sounds just too greasy for me) and eat it slowly with camera close-ups. That’s just gross.
How can you buy into that? She appears to be a relatively decent and nice person. I hear her bio is truly interesting, she was widowed and married well a second time, but this domestic goddess crap? Forget it, I’d rather watch Ina or Paula – or I’ve yet to try Brian – any day.
@ Sarah:
I’ve read numerous places that she is undoubtedly straight, but I had the same question the first time I watched her. I guess that’s a lesson that we can’t judge people by hair-style. I was shocked to learn that Cat Cora is gay, only because she didn’t look the part… if that makes sense.
This is a place to come in order to bust on TFN people. So if you can’t take the heat don’t tell others to “leave (Ann etc) alone”. I can’t stand this classless, crude trailer trashy woman! She and her fat stomach rolls make me ill.
“It’s about Outback Steakhouse quality kind of food.”
What, exactly, is “Outback Steakhouse quality”? I’ve only been to this establishment a few times when it was the only place to have dinner while visiting a family member. Like many chain restaurants, the “quality” at OS is average at best, and the menu is comprised of trendy foods that appeal to the masses. JMO
Sarah- I’ve been wondering the same thing myself!! I LOVE watching Anne and but whenever I talk to my hubby about her, he responds, “oh yeah, the blonde dyke?” lol
Regardless, I don’t care what she looks like or if she’s a muff-diver.. she is one of the best chefs Food Network has right now!
Love all the hilarious comments. I also love Anne. She’s one of the few, very few, bright spots on the FN for me. I really do feel like I learn something from her. I actually miss having new episodes of her right now. Looking forward to new ones.
I find myself flipping channels when she is on, I think it is the combination of the bad hair, too tight clothes and the noises- I don’t take her seriously enough to watch a complete show.She could be an amazing chef I don’t know. the comment about not knowing Cat was gay because she doesn’t look gay is a riot! What does gay look like? or does every lesbian have to look bull dyke? It would be like saying Cat could not be a good chef, she’s too thin!
@ RJTaurus, I agree. Her grunting and screeching (for lack of better words) don’t appeal to me. However, I do enjoy her food.
And hell, I’m gay and I think Cat Cora is drop-dead GORGEOUS.
Do you think FN wants her to be more ‘polished’ and she could care less?
Remember watching Jamie Oliver cooking in his outside fireplace? Sometimes he looked like he hadn’t washed his hair in a week and he had dirt under his fingernails….but I loved watching him cook!
I vote with HoustonRay, rock on Anne!
I like Anne’s cooking tips, but she is just too spunky for my taste. I’m not sure that’s the right word. Maybe silly and twitchy? And if I hear, “This is another restaurant-y trick”, I’m going to hurl my remote, because DUH! that’s the title of the show!
I know this is off topic, but I watched a rerun of throwdown last night and that Teddy guy from nfns was on it. The date was July of last year.
I love her hair – it totally fits her personality.
HOWEVER it does look like it’s due for a trim in that particular photo.
And I’m sure some of you would prefer long greasy hair with strands dangling over and falling in your food . . .
I love Anne.
I love Maude (70′s show starring Bea Arthur).
Anne looks like a young Maude here.
Interesting!
@ Cherry Rose
Outback Quality is exactly as you described. It “appeals to the masses.”
As a native Texan who has eaten my weight many times over in steaks at churrascarias and high-end steakhouses, OS provides great value for what you pay. Granted, I only order steak when I am there. Sometimes I don’t want to spend $200 on two steaks and have to make reservations. I walk out of OS paying $70 for two people, tax, 20% tip included. (I don’t work for them and never have. Am not a big fan of chains, either). I can’t get a decent steak at a non-chain for less than $65.
I think you are not giving OS due credit. It’s the only mid-range steakhouse that consistently trains their chefs to know the difference between rare and medium rare and how to properly cook a steak. It did just win the Zagat Guide for best steaks this year. Yes, the Zagat can be inconsistent and just about every place, good and bad, in Manhattan has a Zagat rating sticker, but it says something. I think Americans, compared to other cultures, whether masses or not, knows beef. Other countries don’t have the terrain or resources to breed cattle they way we do. (Yes, their menu is a terrible insult to Aussies and have NOTHING to do with real Australia, but their chefs know how to prepare good steaks)
As it relates to Anne, she is not showing viewers super posh, haute cuisine nor dumbed-down, fast and efficient meals. She is teaching technique for staples that appeal to most everyone. Her food is delicious but her show isn’t intimidating and doesn’t insist that you purchase exotic or expensive items.
—You learn a lot but there isn’t a high learning curve required to understand her—
Batali chose her to be his sous chef on Iron Chef for a very good reason.
It’s bad enough that we have Guy walking around in that same hairstyle but now they have a female version..grrrrr
Anne Burrell is the dykiest “TV Chef” on TV, or she just likes to look that way. With the bleached blonde fright wig hairstyle, that masculine thumb ring on her massive man-hands left thumb, and her choice of wardrobe, one wonders who her image consultant could be, or her shocking lack of one. She must be 6’4″ and 250lbs, huge! And then she is making all these guttural sounds, and saying things like “ah-rheet” for “all right”, during the preparation. I can hardly get past all this to actually consider her “Restaurant Chef” cooking. I WILL go ONLINE, however, to get her Duck Confit recipe. Hmmm … I wonder if she does Foie Gras??
I LIKE ANN BURRELL BUT PLEASE ASK HER TO STOP SAYING “SO”. COUNT THE TIMES, IN HER SHOW, SHE SAYS “SO”. AMAZING NUMBER AND IT BECOMES IRRITATING.
i love anna everything about her i only seen once and i like her so leave her alone all of u r just jealous,u wish u could be her and where shes at right now!!
if i could i will married her.
I want to attempt to father many children with Anne.