OTHER POTENTIAL FOOD NETWORK SHOWS
BASED OFF SOUTH PARK SONGS:

CherryRose says:

I kind of doubt that Ina is lonely on Christmas. She surely knows that this is a perfect occasion for favorite Chinese take-out! That is, of course, she hasn’t been invited to indulge in shrimp cocktail and ham with a few of her East Hampton cronies ;)

I think this will be a very funny blog :))

PJ says:

Brian Boitano…is NOT gay…I am stunned after that promo-commercial!!!

I need to lay down.

Shark says:

This blog just jumped the shark. Unless antisemitism and racism are funny?

Jadi says:

Yes, LMAO shark you flipping idiot. Those are all songs from southpark. Lighten up.

Dan says:

……..one of my fav posts in awhile. Hilarious!

Sarah says:

I think Goldman is a gefilte boy.

Lady Callahan says:

Oh come ON, I don’t even watch South Park and I got it.

Also what is UP with Ina’s goiter there? She belongs in that Seinfeld episode. That thing is about to go all Alien on her.

martin says:

Lyrics to “What Would Brian Boytano Do?”

What would Brian Boitano do
If he was here right now,
He’d make a plan
And he’d follow through,
That’s what Brian Boitano’d do.

When Brian Boitano was in the olympics,
Skating for the gold,
He did two Salchows and a triple lutz,
While wearing a blind fold.

When Brian Boitano was in the alps,
Fighting grizzly bears,
He used his magical fire breath,
And saved the maidens fair.

So what would Brian Boitano do
If he were here today,
I’m sure he’d kick an ass or two,
That’s what Brian Boitano’d do.

I want this V-chip out of me,
It has stunted my vo-ca-bu-lar-y.

And I just want my mom
To stop fighting everyone

For Wendy I’ll be an activist too,
Cause that’s what Brian Boitano’d do.

And what would Brian Boitano do,
He’d call all the kids in town,
And tell them to unite for true
That’s what Brian Boitano’d do.

When Brian Boitano travelled through time
To the year 3010,
He fought the evil robot kings
and saved the human race again

And when Brian Boitano built the pyramids,
He beat up Kublai Kahn.

Cause Brian Boitano doesn’t take shit from an-y-body

So let’s all get together,
And unite to stop our mom’s
And we’ll save Terrance and Phillip too,
Cause that’s what Brian Boitano’d do.

And we’ll save Terrance and Phillip too,
Cause that’s what Brian Boitano’d dooooo,
That’s what Brian Boitano’d do.

Kittykitty says:

You know, pretty much anything sung by Chef would work for the Neelys. Oh, great. Now I’m nauseous.

martin says:

Alternate versions of “What Would Brian Boitano Do?”

1. Played on Mandolin: http://bit.ly/GTqiO
2. Anime Music Video: http://bit.ly/ZvM1l
3. Gay Anthem Remix: http://bit.ly/14XpIh
4. Japanese version: http://bit.ly/JFIUR
5. German Version: http://bit.ly/uhy3n
6. Piano Version: http://bit.ly/1a12Ev
7. Punk Rock Version: http://bit.ly/3QioMJ
8. Original Version: http://bit.ly/nbeAk

So why shouldn’t Food Network have its own version? This has been a cult favorite on the internet for years…. Its too bad it really makes Food Network seem more silly and pathetic than ever.

jenna says:

Too bad Brian Boitano is a nobody now. The South Park song came out TEN (10!) years ago, and he was pretty much a nobody then, too. I mean how random can you get.

Freezezzy says:

This whole concept (of the show) seems like an absurd joke. I mean, when exactly did he become a chef? Has he ever owned a restaurant, or even written a cookbook? What is it that qualifies him to have his own cooking show?
`
Also, think about it from Melissa D’Arabian’s (or any NFNS competitor for that matter) point of view. She just got her own show after completing the whole Next Food Network Star competition, yet he gets one without having to do anything even related to cooking. Weird.
`
I guess they’ll really give anyone their own show these days.

Mark says:

This one also works for the Neelys…it is to be sung by Pat to Gina: http://www.southparkstuff.com/information/episode_song_lyrics/chef_song_lyrics/8/

oh_come_on says:

You HAVE to watch the Boitano FN video promos!

His red sequin Elvis suit, WITH skates on, running errands OMG, it’s a scream!

Maybe we’ll be treated to cooking in costume each show.

WHO decided on this show?

lucy says:

“You grilled Kenny! You bastard!” is absolutely perfect. He could have a Throw Down with Bobby Flay: Who grills Kenny the best?

Oy.

Kitty says:

Brian Boitano’s not gay? Did I teleport to the wrong universe? DX

martin says:

Believe me, I know, Brian Boitano is gay. He and many other actors / performers are told to not be out by their managers / handlers because America will not accept them – but believe me, as a gay man who is in the business, Brian Boitano is gay. It makes no matter if he has a “beard” girlfriend or not. Or whatever he may say.. He is gay.

Jessi says:

“I can’t believe no one said “I’m SUPER, thanks for asking” for Ted Allen.”

That sounds more like a song for Sandra Lee. ;D

martin says:

Read all about Brian Boitano’s show in today’s LA Times. The link is: http://bit.ly/mrmEa

In the story brian admits that the song “What Would Brian Boitano Do?,” a highlight of the 1999 South Park animated movie, not only will actually serve as the opening theme for the show. The article also has quotes from Bob Tuschman and also reveals that only 4 initial episodes have been filmed. Its a very interesting and fairly in-depth article and worth reading.

Freezezzy says:

The first line in that article was enough to get me laughing:
-
‘”It’s a natural thing for me” he (Boitano) says.’
-
Ok, so he cooks a little at home, and maybe he toyed with the idea of opening up his own restaurant, but none of that will matter, because they’ve already managed to make this show into one big joke.
-
From the name of the show itself, to the fact (I assume) that they’re actually using the song from the (South Park) movie as the show’s theme.
-
Will the madness never end?

Beestinova says:

I am watching this show now. It’s God-awful. Like the retarded love child of “Queer Eye” and any cooking show already on FN…